• Brilliant Life

    Are You Being Provoked? Stepping Away From Victim Mentality

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    Do you have an area in which you are being PROVOKED?

    One way God clears our pathways for blessing is to provoke an area that blocks the blessing.

    Today, my post is on the ’victim mentality’.

    Are you being tricked into acting like a victim? Let God PROVOKE the blessing of overcoming.

    Whatever may be the trigger, if you catch yourself acting like a victim, pay CLOSE attention to what you are thinking and FEELING. Check your pulse, your energy level, your thought streams. Chances are they are all colliding in disarray!

    Catching the first negative thought, that VERY first barely audible inner alarm bell can be the turning point to the mindset, mood and attitude that wants to drag you to the corner of despair and self-doubt — the victim place.

    One aspect of breaking out of a mindset, a mentality that ambushes you whether in small or big ways is to be purposely PROVOKED. We all have our own triggers. Have you learned which ones want to rabbit-trail you to confusion and defeat?

    Maybe it’s another’s actions, flippant attitude, perhaps treating you ‘less than’, taking wrongly from you, not acknowledging your accomplishments, your giftings, ignoring you or just plain not valuing YOU. Or are YOU the one not valuing YOU? It might be a combination of both. Nonetheless, the classic enemy strategy is to talk you into (through thoughts and feelings) that you ARE the victim. You may notice especially as it concerns your giftings, your God-seeded desires and purpose, the things you’ve worked, fought hard for, and the deep matters of the heart.

    One aspect of overcoming and the lesson to be learned may be to get better at discerning when you first sense thoughts and feelings want to  take you down the ‘pain lane’ — the lane of self-doubt, irritation or going into freeze modevictim mode.

    You may be well aware of the easy areas that no longer pull you into negativity, doubt or victim-type thinking. You have easy success in those areas. But if you’re branching out, taking new territory, walking a new uncharted path, it can be a time of vulnerability and you probably feel less sure-footed.

    Recently, I had that very thing happen to me. It was an annoying matter that perhaps comes with the territory of new exposure in business, of ideas, concepts and strategies, yet THIS TIME wisdom told me it was a ploy by the enemy to get me drawn into doubt, fume or gloom at someone else’s unethical behavior. The surprising blessing is that it had EXACTLY the OPPOSITE EFFECT!

    I not only thought but FELT the inner knowing and confirmation of what was transpiring. Someone not wanting to do their own work — strategizing, planning and creating in a particular business area, took the cheap route. Frustrating, irritating? Yes. Yet I had a choice to make.  It was as though an annoying voice of ‘what are you going to do?’ was inwardly pushing me to DO SOMETHING outwardly.   I took pause to work it through.  With crystal clear clarity the ‘tilt, tilt, tilt’ stop-gap insight came.  The enemy wanted ME to feel somewhat victimized by THEIR bad behavior, and respond in some way.   Whatever way that might have been probably wouldn’t shine with the hues of being an overcomer.

    This time the enemy had  overplayed his hand!

    This matter simply wasn‘t my problem. Their behavior, their actions would rest on their shoulders. If it was a matter that needed action or response, I trust God to show me in wisdom and peace what, how and when to do something. It took working through, but God PROVOKED the insight and BLESSING!

    Remember, the enemy ALWAYS overplays his hand!

    You can walk away peacefully knowing you didn’t buy the lie. The LIE is that in some circumstances the only pattern you have to use in dealing with the situation is to wear the victim hat.

    In our faith walk, if there aren’t any testings, it’s hard to measure progress. When the test is passed, YOUR OWN test, the high-five inner confirmation arises. The sense of peace and freedom flow in your spirit.

    Today, be encouraged to allow your faith tests to turn you to a positive stance, the truthful place of peace, and UNDERSTANDING. The place of insight and cues about the experience you’re facing.

    Our willingness to learn and grow keeps us pliable and putty-like in the Potter’s hands.

    Allow God to PROVOKE you, right straight into His blessing.

     

              Coachpreneur™Judyann

           Your Personal Spiritually Savvy Insights Coach ©

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    Brilliant Life by Divine Design ™ LLC.  All rights reserved.

     

     

     

  • Brilliant Life

    In Facing your Fears, are you a Bull or a Cow?

    What are you facing today?

    Is there a fear you aren’t facing?   Sidestepping?    Hoping will just vanish?     What have you relied on in the past that is just not working today, as you face new fears or one of life’s storms?

    There is a saying that goes like this:  ‘bulls run into a storm, cows run away from it’.

    Well, we’re not cows or bulls but human nature doesn’t always want to face problems, fears, anxieties head on.   We may need a little time to stop, turn around and FACE the storm. To be strengthened to go into it full on.  Get the help we need. Depending on the size of the fear, or force of the storm, we may begin to look for alternative ports FROM the storm while IN the storm.  That’s where it gets interesting.

    What might you be relying on for guidance?   There’s no crystal ball, tea leaves at the bottom of a cup, or daily horoscopes that will safely, clearly, truly lead you out of your storm.   But there is a source that will never fail, never mislead, never condemn, and never point you in the wrong direction.   Never.

    God_inside.jpgThat source is the spirit of the living God richly abundantly purposefully dwelling within and without —  willing, longing, desiring us to call upon His magnificence and wisdom.    Our part?   We need to cut the clatter, quell all the voices and get to the still quiet waters of God.

    I know from personal experience facing and living through some very difficult storms that my attempts to just do something, anything almost always met with more struggle,  until I got quiet and listened.

    When I listened, gleaned, interpreted God’s path from our time together, then purposeful action arose and it met with little resistance.

    The right people showed up, solutions appeared and opportunities arose.

    God is really good at showing us our part, and defining what is His part.   I’ve noticed it always seems to involve surrendering something, whether a misbelief or lie about God and his love toward us, about what we’ve believed or been told about ourselves that isn’t true, or perhaps even the magnitude, scope and size of the situational storm and the very fear attached to it.     I believe it’s at that point of acknowledgement and surrender that clean clear waters flowing with solutions come to us.

    There are times to read, journal, study scripture or other wonderful books and teachings, but for the biggest storms we face, I am convinced not only by experience but by His very witness to me that we must be still and  ‘come to the garden alone’ for insight, clarity and direction.

    From that time spent in practicing God’s presence, abiding, communing with God, our unique intimate relationship is formed, strengthened and made secure.   Within our intimate relationship with God,  we’ll get the direction, the answers, the first steps to our desired destination filled with overcoming solutions, trusted advisors and needed resources.

    That’s where the power is, where the answers await discovery, and solutions with a personal divine ‘mapquest’ attached can be found.

    Have you acknowledged that source today?   Have you invited God into your problem?

    The storm takes on a whole new hue when you do.  It doesn’t look so ominous, threatening and debilitating.   Seems smaller already doesn’t it?

    ‘Bulls rush into the storm, cows run away’…… 

    Divine enablement and guidance is yours for the asking.  May today be a day of quiet resolve, peace and supernatural solutions.

    Coachpreneur™Judyann | Your Personal Spiritually Savvy Insights Coach

                ‘One Divine Insight is Worth Its Weight in Gold’ –               Coachpreneur™ Judyann

  • Brilliant Life

    Someone Pushing Your Boundaries?

    Boundaries_stand.jpgEver struggle with personal boundary setting?  And once set, reinforcing them?

    When we set boundaries in relationships, it may be necessary to go past the point of head knowledge and emotional sensing to spiritual discernment for the boundary reinforcement.   Take for example the tirade of another verbally coming against you with every accusation and affront possible as a defense to you confronting bad behavior.     While this person may be trying to blame-shift their way out of responsibility, the affront to you is painful, real and offensive.   

    If we come into agreement with the mud-slinging.

    Learning to shift quickly to a spiritual birds-eye view perspective may help you know best how to handle what’s coming against you and your boundaries.     From this stance you may be able to spiritually discern the negative force at play, not only at work with the violator, but also attempting to trigger your defenses in the hopes of escalating the confrontation.     Learning to discern spiritually gives you the insight needed to choose how you’ll deflect the arrows coming at you.

    Recently I had an experience that tested my resolve.  It was a relationship boundary that had been crossed once too often.    Previously I either ignored or minimally responded.   This time, however as I shifted to spiritual insight, I knew my tack had to change.   I deflected the arrow with a spiritual truth, not a personal obvious truth.    I de-escalated the confrontation with clear, distinct words of spiritual insight and clarity that left no room for doubt as to their meaning.    It immediately changed the dynamic of the confrontation.  Instead of engaging in a battle of the wills I chose a spiritual response that reinforced the previous boundary in a whole new way.    I still had to stand firm emotionally and verbally enforce the boundary, but as I shifted to a spiritual view the negativity diminished.     It was as though the  wind had been taken out of the blame-shifting negativity sails trying to operate.

    When confronted with a negative familiar pattern  in the form of a boundary violation by another, it takes an unfamiliar response to stop the interchange.   When we  mentally or emotionally come into agreement with the negativity, we give credence to its power and usually enflame the situation to a greater degree.  But as we perhaps see spiritually the woundedness, the hurt, the fear trying to control the situation — in them OR US –we have fresh ways with more choices in responding.    Spiritual discernment isn’t magical, it isn’t mystical, but it’s  real and oftentimes an overlooked aspect of boundary keeping.

    For example, it’s easy to see outright anger in someone’s actions, behaviors and words.  It isn’t always easy to discern the full-spectrum spiritual meaning of the scene.    Someone who still operates from a place of woundedess may react out of anger as the only way of seemingly protecting themselves.    You don’t need to be a therapist to recognize that simple truism, but it does take keen spiritual discernment to see the root, the tree and the branches of the cause giving you added anti-inflammatory tactics to work with.

    Woundedness, rejection, abandonment, fear all have spiritual dynamics that operate as a defensive pose to a controlling needy ego and the unregenerated soul.   When viewed spiritually, a response of love, albeit tough love spoken truthfully may be the antidote to anger’s emotional posture.    It can be the checkmate move needed to stop the conflict, causing a new dynamic and level of empowerment needed to reinforce a boundary while staying above the obvious fray.

    Assessing and responding from an empowered  place of spiritual integrity is a wonderful tool to assist and help  keep your boundaries intact.    There may still be some emotional fallout, a tinge of mental anguish but spiritually the battle has been won, as you purposed to respond from a whole and spiritually assessed viewpoint.  No one gets it right every time, we all misjudge at times, but those times that you know that you know you used spiritual insights and integrity to deflect the fray is very fulfilling.

    Hindsight is 20/20, but spiritual insight is powerful NOW, in the present.

    Power struggles, boundary charges, personal affronts are part of life.   Employing aspects of spiritual insight can be a game changer in boundary setting and boundary keeping.

    If you’re worn out trying to logically or emotionally convince another of boundaries that are important to you, shift to viewing from a spiritual perspective.  Insights gained and employed from that perspective may be just the remedy needed.

     

     

    Coachpreneur™ Judyann | Your Spiritually Savvy Insights Coach©

     

    ‘One Divine Insight is Worth Its Weight in Gold’ – Coachpreneur Judyann

     Brilliant Life by Divine Design LLC©

     

     

     

     

     

  • Brilliant Life

    Who are you created to be?

    How much time have you spent trying to determine what you think you should be? 

     

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    Are your decisions influenced by financial gain, other’s acclaim?

    Are you duty-bound to keep plugging on a path that feels more like a work-horse plowing an endless field of sameness?

    Not everyone has the same inner awakening process, but the telltale signs that accompany most begin with times of longing for a deeper meaning, fulfillment and joy in what you do.

     

     

  • Brilliant Life

    Step into Self-Forgiveness

    How good are you at self-forgiveness?   Maybe you’re going through a season of transition or growth  which can start an endless spiral of shoulda, coulda, woulda’s. Especially if there’s an area of failure, perceived or real.   Hindsight is always 20/20.  But if you’re getting caught in your own crossfire of blame, shame or guilt, take a time-out to check your self-talk and self-THOUGHT. Without consciously meaning to, you may be stuck in a whirlwind of unforgiveness.   Toward yourself.

    forgive.yourself.jpgAll day today, I had this sense of a nagging irritating feeling like an incessant, yet invisible little yipping dog tagging after me.   I went for a walk, watched a movie I had rented, yet the irritation remained.   Finally near dinner time, I took a solitude/journaling break.  I have a process that I call ‘stepping through the looking glass’ where I posture myself to view what’s going on from a different perspective.  One word showcased itself in my mind’s eye.    Unforgiveness.    Not toward another, but toward myself!    

     

    So that was the annoying nagging sensation I had all day!   Then as this revelation unfolded,  I found myself working a little extra hard to not be further annoyed that it took all day to uncover!   Oftentimes true forgiveness toward yourself can be the hardest.   Why?    Well, with one hand there’s the pointing finger of accusation AT you, while you’re opening the palm of the other hand attempting to receive God’s loving-kindness and self-forgiveness.   That’s why journaling it out for me, keeps me sane!   It almost unfailingly gives me the breakthrough.  

    I heard someone quip recently that they were glad pencils have erasers.  I am too.  I saw myself erasing my name that topped this imaginary unforgiveness list.  There, gone. 

    If you’ve ever had to walk out the effects of unforgiveness toward yourself, you’ve probably discovered, it isn’t loving, it isn’t sacrificial, it isn’t BENEFICIAL to keep yourself from the ‘grace place’ of forgiveness.   Cut yourself some slack, come into agreement with a loving God who knows, sees and loves you–mistakes, bungles, failures and all. It’s that very limitless loving-kindness that facilitates positive change in our thoughts, feelings, beliefs and actions as it seeps into the very essence of our being with its balm.  Seeing yourself with a fresh, loving,  alive perspective as God does is the go-to antidote for unforgiveness toward yourself.   It’s free flowing, available 24/7, and ours for the asking and taking.   So, if God’s not keeping a list, why are we?   Real or imagined, your name on the list, as well as the list itself has to go! 

    As you free yourself from the blame-shame-guilt game mindset of unforgiveness, new success solutions will be drawn to you. The air has been cleared and you step back into alignment with yourself, God and others. New free-flowing energy returns. It’s the perfect atmosphere needed for next-step forward momentum.

    How about you?    Does the unforgiveness list have your name written on it?   

     

    Today’s Journaling Point:       

     

    ‘As I purpose to forgive myself for (fill in your blank)__________ , what action might I take today as a fruit of receiving forgiveness for myself.’

     

    My prayer for you today is a free-flowing day of self-forgiveness in every area of your life!  

     

    Coachpreneur™Judyann | Brilliant Life by Divine Design©

     

    Coachpreneur™Judyann | Brilliant Life by Divine Design©

    ‘One divine insight is worth it’s weight in gold!’  – Coachpreneur™ Judyann